


I am a selkie upon the sea

by Ursula



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Alternate Universe
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-12-07
Updated: 2008-12-07
Packaged: 2019-02-05 14:43:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,728
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12796662
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Ursula/pseuds/Ursula
Summary: A strange rebirth gives needed help to a struggling village after war ravages earth.





	I am a selkie upon the sea

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Haven, the archivist: This story was originally archived at [Fandom Haven Story Archive (FHSA)](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Fandom_Haven_Story_Archive), was scheduled to shut down at the end of 2016. To preserve the archive, I began working with the OTW to transfer the stories to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in November 2017. If you are this creator and the work hasn't transferred to your AO3 account, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Fandom Haven Story Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/fhsa/profile).

  
Author's notes: Written for SKINKS   


* * *

Title: I am a Selkie on the Sea

 

Author/Pseudonym: Ursula

 

Fandom: X Files

 

Pairing: Mulder/Skinner/Krycek

 

Rating: Adult Slash

 

Status: Complete

 

Date Posted: 12-24-07

 

Archive: FHSA 

 

 

E-mail address for feedback: Fan4Richie@aol.com

 

 

Classification: Fantasy

 

Series/Sequel: Is this story part of a series: One of two

 

Disclaimers: No profit, fan fiction for fun

 

 

Notes: Based on a quick story I wrote for the Persuaders

 

Warnings: Slash

 

 

Time Frame: Post series

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

I woke to Mulder whispering, "Please, Sir, we have to go. We have to go now."

 

Blinking I barely had time to be realize it really was Mulder and that he was dressed in heavy outdoor wear.

 

"What?"

 

"Just believe me, Walter, get what you need and we need to go. Call your family. Get them to come too. It's coming. The invasion is not going to wait."

 

I was tired and confused, but I trusted Mulder and I believed him.

 

OooOooO

 

The Sanday islanders thought we were pretty odd when we bought so much land, loaded the docks with supplies. We left my sister, Sarah, Kim, the three gunmen, Dana and her mother to organize, heading back for one last attempt to persuade our family members to come with us. 

 

In the last moment, my brother Wayne joined us. My brothers, Mitch and Gary, mocked him for a fool, but Wayne finally stood up and defied them. He said, "Walter has always been the best of us. You're going to regret not listening to him."

 

As it was, we barely made it out. Somewhere along the way, Marita Covarrubias joined us and Jeffrey Spender. They just showed up and I couldn't say no. It was just as well since we lost several people fighting our way to the harbor. Unfortunately, we lost our doctor and our veterinarian along with several other good men and women, fighting our way to the ship.

 

We arrived to a well organized village. We had housing ready and Doggett had built a new communal hall we would need. 

 

It was a difficult year. We didn't lose any more people, but that was only through hard work. We had live stock, but not enough to spare for slaughter. We would live mostly off the sea as those of the Orkneys always had.

 

OooOooO

 

Meanwhile, earth survived. The rebels kept their word. The tactics they used did not directly harm humans, but unfortunately, the aftermath was enough to wipe out more than half of the population. Most of the oil supply was gone, destroyed to kill the Oiliens that slithered through it. Plagues devastated the cities. No one knows for sure who released the contaminants from the labs where they were created, but the effect seemed to have been equal handed. 

 

Every nation had lost citizens. I doubted if there was a single government remaining. Earth survived, but we were in the throes of a new dark age.

 

OooOooO

 

A lot had happened in a year. Mulder and I became lovers. That was probably the biggest surprise. He moved into my cabin shortly after we arrived. He moved into my bed a few weeks after that. We had been lovers in the past, but I never expected to hold him. 

 

Neither one of us wanted to hurt Scully. Hell, I would have been willing to share him, but Scully wanted none of that. She didn't grieve for long. John Doggett courted her with the faithful passion she needed and deserved. 

 

Yeah, I know. I thought Monica and John were an item. Turns out I was wrong. Soon after Mulder turned up at my door, Monica moved in with Marita Covarrubias. The two of them had half the orphans of the village in their care. I had never seen Marita as other than a Spender's bitch queen, but it seems she had a daughter that she loved. A daughter she lost. I think Marita felt solace in caring for our orphans. I thought Monica just wanted to help with the orphans until I walked in on them kissing. I never had good gaydar. The two women seemed very happy together.

 

 

My brother's voice called me back from wool gathering.

 

Wayne said, "Someone is cutting the nets."

 

"Who the hell would do that?" I asked. A net of fish could make the difference between eating and going hungry. 

 

"I don't know, but we better find out," Wayne growled. "I got a kid coming. He's not going hungry."

 

Wayne and Kim married soon after we settled on the islands. Wayne's ex didn't want children and she didn't care for having a surgical scar on her perfect body. Wayne had a vasectomy instead. Scully was studying surgery and hoped someday to be able to reverse it, but Kim and Wayne didn't want to wait. I didn't think I was able to have children, but my 'donation' took. Kim was due near Christmas. She was huge, but happy. I didn't know how I felt. I never thought of myself as being a father. Sharon and I tried and I always thought it was my lack. Sharon went in for testing and told me she was fine. I believed her and carried around that burden as my failure in our marriage. I reminded myself I was still not a father; I was going to be the child's uncle. 

 

"Mulder and I will spend the night in a boat," I said. 

 

I saw my lover walked toward us and couldn't help smiling. I never expected to be happy and sometimes I felt guilty because I had so much joy in my life. Monica said I needed to accept it. She said I deserved it. I tried to accept that I had a right to have a good life, but my sins weighted me down. 

 

William was with his father. He was growing fast and was a happy little boy despite all the things he had been through, 

 

"Daddy and I got lots of shellfish!" William announced.

 

 

Shellfish gathering was one of the few jobs Mulder liked to do. He was assigned mostly to teach school. He had tried his hand at shepherding. It took most of a day to gather the herd after Mulder was distracted by some strange sea creature he thought he saw.

 

The most abundant shellfish were blue mussels. I didn't like them, but they filled the belly. Monica made chowder out of them that I could pretend was clams instead. We all had to eat and that meant eating what there was. I grimaced. Lost fish meant more mussels to eat. 

 

"We're going to have to watch the nets from now on," I said. "I thought you and I would go out tonight."

 

Mulder smiled and said, "As long as you keep me warm." He patted William's shoulder and said, "Go play, son."

 

"But there's still work to do," William said. 

 

"Your work is done," Mulder said. "You have to play to go up strong and bright."

 

William nodded and ran off towards the village where a group of kids were playing.

 

"He's too serious," Mulder said. 

 

"I know," I replied. "But you're doing the right thing with him. Encourage him to be a kid."

 

"I want to be a good dad," Mulder said.

 

My lover didn't have to say that he wanted to be a better dad than William Mulder. That we both knew.

 

OooOooO

 

We spent the night hiding under a tarp. Nothing much happened. In fact, the nets were so full that we made up for the fish we lost earlier. You got me. It made no sense.

 

The next morning we found some boxes of medical supplies pushed up on shore. I say pushed because they seemed further on shore than the tide could have brought them. We were happy for what the boxes contained, antibiotics and some surgical instruments that we would be glad to have. 

 

We watched another night without anything happening except a little frustration on our part. Making love in a boat is not too safe.

 

This time, the boxes contained Christmas ornaments, toys, and candy. I felt like shoving it back in the sea, but I couldn't. That candy would brighten our children's eyes. I ordered the boxes brought to the communal hall. We would divide the gifts and add what we could. Our Christmas would less bleak that I feared because of this strange bounty.

 

I could not help staring out to the sea. What was out there?

 

OooOooO

 

The next few weeks were peaceful except for the gifts that kept appearing. I held my silence as the bounty brought cheer to our people. Each morning, we would find the boxes. Sewing needles, cloth, and thread in one box. Another held sanitary pads...a plebian gift, but one that the women appreciated more than almost anything else. Our friend or friends seemed to have wise taste in what he deposited on our shore.

 

I don't think that the boxes were flotsam and jetsam. They were too carefully packed and picked for that. Nothing was water damaged and the boxes were intact.

 

Mulder and I watched a couple mornings, but saw nothing. We couldn't see everywhere on the island and the new bounty was always deposited away from where we spied.

 

Meanwhile, it seemed as if the fish were more abundant than ever. I heard Monica saying that it was a blessing from the sea because we were not hunting seals.

 

Unfortunately Monica said it when Gawain was listening. Gawain was born on the islands and he was not very fond of Monica. Gawain was an unfortunate case. Although local, he had lived in London for years, losing his folk beliefs. The older people here agreed with Monica about not hunting seals. They remembered stories of the souls of drowned fisherman returning as seals, which kept them from hunting them. Gawain had equal disdain for Monica's new age beliefs and his own village traditions. 

 

Gawain stood up and growled that he was going to hunt a seal. He wanted some red meat and he wasn't going to let any foolish woman stop him.

 

I could have stopped Gawain, but I worried about how the villagers would feel about it. Not that Gawain was well-liked, but he was their kin for all of that.

 

I let him go.

 

OooOooO

 

I had almost forgotten Gawain when his mother, Morna Davies, came to me and said he was missing. I asked her why she had not asked a villager to look for him.

 

"They say he is courting a curse," Morna admitted. "They will not go looking for him. I thought you would. You and your Mulder. The spirits love you."

 

Shrugging, I said, "We'll go, Morna. See if you can talk to him if we find them. He needs to forget hunting seals."

 

"I think he's learned," Morna said. "I think the sea has taught him. His father would not hear of me teaching him the old ways. The man worked himself to death in London and I came home. It was too late for Gawain, I think. He hates it here and now he is stuck here forever."

 

"I'm sorry," I said. "Yet in returning here, you saved your son's life. I wish he could realize that."

 

"I hope he will, Walter," Morna said.

 

It had been a bright day, an extraordinary one for this late in the year. That explained why Gawain was lobster red. 

 

The young man sat on a large rock, far enough from shore not to risk swimming unless you were a great swimmer. Gawain was not much of a swimmer.

 

Stark naked, Gawain was too parched to swear. He climbed into our boat and grabbed the bottle of water we offered him. It was a good thing that Monica had been cultivating vast quantities of aloe in our greenhouse. Gawain was going to need a lot of. Mulder wrapped him in a sheet dampened with cool water until we could get him to that aloe. A couple aspirin would help him deal with the pain.

 

Gawain didn't find his voice until we were nearly to shore. I couldn't understand him at first then I heard him rasp out, "The seal had green eyes."

 

I had never heard of a green eyed seal. I thought Gawain was delirious.

 

The boat and Gawain's clothing turned up the next morning.

 

Gawain was feeling better and his voice was back.

 

"I had spotted a seal and I was going to harpoon it. Suddenly the boat was rocking and I fell into the water. I think I hit my head. The seal pushed me toward the rock and I remember climbing onto it. I must have passed out and when I woke my clothes were gone."

 

"The seal took your clothing?" Mulder said.

 

"That was not a natural seal. It had green eyes and beautiful long eyelashes. It was a selkie."

 

OooOooO

 

The children had all heard the story and Mulder told tales of selkies to them in the meeting hall. Monica brought out her guitar and sang, 

 

"I am a man upon the land.

I am a Silkie in the sea. 

And when I'm far frae every strand 

My home it is in Sule Skerry."

 

I remember hearing Joan Baez sing that when I was in college. Now I found myself near weeping. 

 

Monica followed me out when I went outside. "Bad memories?"

 

I couldn't tell her. I shook my head and said, "Good ones. I haven't heard that song in years. It took me back."

 

It was a lie. The tears were for a man I loved. A man I had killed. For some reason, the Selkie song reminded me of him. My Alex, my angel and demon in one beautiful body...

 

OooOooO

 

That night, Mulder stroked my face gently. I kissed his fingers when they drifted near lips. 

 

"I never asked you what you did with him."

 

Mulder didn't have to say whom. I knew. The man we had shared between us. The shadowy ghost who had kept us apart for years after we lost him.

 

"I weighed his body with chains and lowered him into the sea," I admitted.

 

It was the truth. I had meant to bury him, but once I had hidden him on my fishing boat, it seemed almost inevitable that I would bring him out to the sea. I had wrapped his body in chains; they should have been silver. I let him go, watching the canvas wrapped sack sink. It had been such a beautiful day, the sun dancing on the water, the ocean exactly the color of Alex's eyes. He had no funeral except my tears, no eulogy but my regret.

 

"We had no choice," Mulder said.

 

I held my lover close, grateful that he tried to share my guilt. He had not fired the bullets. He had not lowered that tragic corpse into the sea.

 

OooOooO

 

Weeks went by with no trouble. We had nets full of fish and boxes of bounty. I think everyone felt blessed especially Morna Davies since her son, Gawain, was now a model son of the Orkney Islands, eager to absorb every legend that the old folks had to tell.

 

Mulder though. Mulder was tormented as he had not been since he burned his life away in pursuit of his sister and the conspiracy which has helped doom most of humanity. 

 

"I'll help you with the nets," Mulder said, his eyes scanning the sea.

 

I agreed, but I knew he wasn't interested in the fish. Mulder was starting to believe the old legends. 

 

The frightening part was...

 

So did I...

 

OooOooO

 

The first net we drew in was full of shining salmon. There was more than enough to feed the village for a week. If the next net was as heavy, I would have to agree that the village was blessed.

 

The next net however held a frightened young seal. Hacking at the net to free it was something incredible. It was a naked human figure with long greenish toned hair. Teeth white as pearls grimaced in fear. I knew those green sea eyes. I knew that beautiful face. It was Alex, an Alex changed by the sea. 

 

I used the sparse supply of oil recklessly to power near the net. Just as we arrived, the last of the net shredded and the seal was free. I managed to reach and grab a handful of Alex's hair. He raised his hand to strike at me with the knife, but his hand wavered. Tears fell from his eyes. Seeing his tears, I let him go despite Mulder's shout. I watched his body shimmer and man became seal. A seal with shining brown hair and green, green eyes.

 

Mulder would have leaped into the sea to follow him, but I held him back. 

 

"Let him go," I said. "Let him have peace."

 

"I can't," Mulder replied. "I have to know. I have to talk with him. How did this happen? If we can understand it, perhaps more of us could become like him. We could live in the sea!"

 

OooOooO

 

I really believed that I had talked Mulder out of it and I really had to travel to Westray Island. We had some trading to do and I was the Mayor of Sanday. It was my job to negotiate. I invited Mulder along, but he said he would be bored out of his freaking mind. I believed him. Mulder was not much on business. He had never cared for meetings.

 

With all the bounty that we had been getting from the sea, we were able to trade for some additional cattle and several nets. I didn't even have to explain why we needed more nets than we could manufacture ourselves.

 

Eager to be home, I rode through the night. I arrive at dawn. Kim was in labor so I didn't look for Mulder. I waited with my brother, both of us pacing back and forth in front of Wayne's house. Scully came out and said, "Bad news."

 

I gripped my brother's arm as he looked at me in a panic. Scully sighed and said, "No, she's fine. The baby is fine. It was false labor."

 

As Wayne made to go into his house, Scully said, "Kim is not very happy right now. I would make myself scarce, Walter. In fact, you better go down to the beach and check on Mulder. He's doing something crazy."

 

"What about Wayne?" I asked.

 

"He's the husband. He'll have to deal with Kim. You better go to the north beach."

 

Crazy and Mulder fit just fine. I knew and dreaded what he was doing. When had I ever stopped Mulder when he had a wild hair sideways? Not even love could come between him and his quest.

 

The truth of it was. I didn't think it was scientific curiosity this time. It was Alex. Mulder wanted him back. 

 

I deserved it. If I lost them both, it was my fault. 

 

As I feared, there was a seal penned. She wasn't uncomfortable exactly. Mulder wouldn't torture any creature if he could help it. Yet the pen was far enough from shore that no seal could reach her without exposing themselves to capture. 

 

As I arrived, I saw the brown furred seal throw itself on shore. A moment later, Alex was standing on land, his seal skin in his hand. Water droplets fell like diamonds from his sleek body. He saw me and his expression wounded me. I knew he felt I betrayed him.

 

I yelled, "No, Alex, I'll let the seal loose. Go Back."

 

Alex didn't listen. I can't blame him for distrusting me. He ran over the beach more swiftly than anything human could.

 

I heard Alex's cry as nets entrapped him. He struggled, cursing to free himself. Mulder emerged from concealment. 

 

"Mulder, don't do this!" I yelled. 

 

My lover wasn't listening. He grabbed Alex's fur from where he had dropped it. He held it up and said, "Alex, I just want to talk to you."

 

"Let the seal go. She did nothing to you. I'll pay with my life as many times as you think I owe, but let her go."

 

"I don't want to hurt you," Mulder said. "I just need to know how this happened to you."

 

I walked to the pen and let the seal free. She dragged herself to the water, but stayed near shore, her liquid eyes gazing toward Alex.

 

Mulder stood with Alex's seal skin in his hand. I walked to the net and helped Alex free himself. He stood, his head bowed, defeated. 

 

I walked to Mulder and said, "Give me the skin."

 

"I only want to talk to him," Mulder said.

 

"If he chooses to talk to you, fine," I replied. 

 

Mulder's eyes narrowed, his lush lips pulled into a stubborn thin line. He shook his head. "He won't. You know how he is."

 

"He's paid," I said. "If you love me, give me the skin."

 

My heart sank as Mulder took a step back. I looked toward Alex and said, "I'm sorry. Forgive me."

 

Soft, still warm fur draped over my arm. Mulder said, "I do love you. Let him go if you have to."

 

I held the fur out and said, "Alex, Mulder didn't mean to harm you. We won't hurt the seals, but you have to stop cutting the nets."

 

"But the seals could die if I don't," Alex said. 

 

"If one gets caught, come and get us," I told him. 

 

Alex stared at me. "You won't try to capture me?"

 

"No, you are free. You've earned your freedom."

 

Mulder said, "Alex, I didn't mean to hurt you. I had to talk to you. Please forgive me."

 

Alex paused and brushed back his long hair. He said, "You could have just asked."

 

Mulder's eyes dropped. He said, "I was wrong."

 

"You were," Alex said.

 

"Alex, why did you come here?" I asked. 

 

Alex said, "To be near you. To see you. To help you."

 

His words threatened to break my heart. I closed my eyes and said, "Thank you, Alex."

 

"I chose you to save me," Alex said. "They had infected me. I did not want to be one of them, their creature. If I was killed before the virus devoured all that was human in me, I would be free. I'm sorry, Walter."

 

He should have been sorry. I had lived those moments in a thousand nightmares. The words burst from me before I could stop them, "Get the hell out of here."

 

Alex whispered, "I'm sorry." 

 

I watched him vanish into the ocean.

 

OooOooO

 

That night, Mulder got out of our bed. I pretended to sleep and let him go. I knew what he was doing. He was going to talk to Alex. I wished I had the courage to go with him. I wish I had not spoken those last words.

 

As weary as I was, I could not sleep. I was afraid I would lose Mulder. I finally stopped pretending and went to the kitchen to indulge in some coffee. That was something Alex should find us. We were running low and the climate here meant that we couldn't grow beans. I hated to think of a world without coffee. 

 

A world without Mulder would be worse.

 

OooOooO

 

Before Mulder returned, Doggett knocked on my door. He said, "Kim's in labor again. Dana thinks it's the real thing."

 

It was easy to shove my own concerns aside for my brother and his wife, my beloved friend, Kim.

 

Kim was not doing well. I could see the strain in Scully's face. She said, "I might have to do a C section. The baby is too big and Kim's losing strength."

 

Our little clinic was equipped for the basics. Thanks to the difficulty of our escape, we had lost the obstetrics equipment along with the doctor who would have used it. Scully was doing her best, but she had never practiced her profession unless you count patching Mulder up. She had not yet done a cesarean and I could tell she was worried.

 

Mulder appeared. He has a smudge of sand on either side of his face as if someone had cupped his face to kiss him. He said, "Alex can help."

 

How did Mulder even know what was happening?

 

Giving me a sickly grin, Mulder said, "My little extra gifts are back."

 

Oh. Oh shit.

 

Mulder shook his head and said, "I'm all right."

 

I hoped he knew something I didn't. The last time his gifts had appeared, I thought he had gone insane. After that, his 'loving' father, Spender, had tried to harvest the alien matter from his brain, resulting in a tumor that nearly killed him.

 

Mulder said, "Alex can help. He has some new talents."

 

Skeptical, I said, "I don't think Kim would be helped by a swim."

 

"No, but Alex can sing. His song can help her."

 

I thought he was insane, but my brother said, "Let him try."

 

Alex appeared in the doorway. He wore his seal fur around his waist, preserving his modesty if he had any.

 

Where before he had been a handsome man, now his beauty was heart piercing. He walked into the room where Kim panted and he sang.

 

I had never heard anything like it. It was low, melodious, lacking human words, but full of meaning. It filled me with peace. I felt my grief and my anger fade. 

 

Mulder took my hand and said, "Listen, Walter. Listen to what he is saying through his song."

 

 

In my mind, I saw Alex wake beneath the sea. He was neither human nor super soldier. The chains fell from him, drifting toward the ocean floor. A colony of seals moved around him, nudging him, curious and perhaps trying to help. There was a shimmering light and Alex was transformed. He swam free of the chains of his life and his pain. 

 

The selkie swam, ate fish, and, at first, nothing troubled him. In his seal body, a human heart beat though. He still loved me. He still loved Mulder. He was drawn here to watch over us and yearn for our touch.

 

Now, his song became stronger. The burdens of our grief lifted. Kim cried out and Alex opened the door to the birthing room. My brother, Wayne, tried to push him out, but Alex was too strong. 

 

"Wayne, let Alex try to help Kim," I yelled.

 

"How can a merman help?"

 

"He's a selkie," Mulder said. "and a healer. Let him try."

 

Alex's song was one of beginnings. He sang of plants pushing from the womb of earth. Of the struggle of chicks to break through the hard shell with soft beaks and frantic wingless flight. He sang of all the mysteries of life. 

 

I could forget all that was brutal about life. I caught my breath and I held Mulder's hand harder. Kim's face grew peaceful for a moment as Alex touched her belly. I don't know how he did it, but with the next thrust, a head crowned. Kim shuddered and thrust again. I watched my son born, a child three of us created, a son born for my brother from the womb of a woman I loved in my way as much as I could love any woman.

 

The baby squalled. He was a boy, a huge ten pound boy. Wayne said, "Meet Walter Wayne Skinner."

 

I shook my head and said, "Don't name him after me."

 

"Who better? Don't argue with me, Walter." Wayne said.

 

We were ushered out to allow Scully to help Kim clean up and probably curse both my brother and myself a little. 

 

OooOooO

 

Before Alex could escape, I grabbed his hand. I drew him into a kiss and I said, "Thank you."

 

"Please stay," I whispered.

 

Alex said, "Do you love me?"

 

"I have always loved you."

 

It was true. I tried to hate him. I had every reason to hate him, but I could never entirely escape him.

 

"Then I will stay some nights," Alex said. "And I will bring you many gifts."

 

I realized then what day it was. Christmas. Our first Christmas in the Orkney Islands.

 

And what a beautiful Christmas it was.

 

The end


End file.
